keeping my head afloat

the new txt album is on repeat. just wanted to add that.

and blue lock is my favourite shonen perhaps even more than aot which is forever number 1 for me

me and my love for the sports genre mmmmmmmmmmm

Woah. I didn’t realise so much had time had passed since I last logged in here.

This is gonna be an unformatted post I fear because I’m currently typing in the middle of the night on my iPad with my fingers and not a keyboard and mouse. I really can’t be asked to put in the html tags… maybe I’ll fix that later TT

Okay so my acads actually started looking up in april, about three weeks before my finals. I was at my wits end, so behind on lectures, not yet confident in any study method and the shadow of failure hung around my neck. My best friend and I were working late at uni when a senior came up to us and started a conversation. Long story short, I left with loads of advice, new resources and a lot more confidence. Finals were a nightmare but I pulled through, and come results day, I found out I passed!

Also my temp jobs pulled through and I was able to buy my iPad Pro! No more working off a mobile phone anymore hehehe. Honestly the only reason I made it through first year med school (apart from God of course) was because I practically became a library hermit. With no functioning computer or laptop, I was constantly using the ones at the library (also thank God for the laptop loan service). Hopefully second year runs A LOT smoother @.@

Another thing I’m glad about is that my relationship with aunts and uncles became a lot better. At first I was reluctant to go home for the summer break, but now I’m reluctant to head back to uni. We became closer than we’ve ever been, a lot of misunderstandings were resolved and we bonded a lot… as cheesy as that may sound haha

I finally got to visit my friends up in Manchester, their campus is so pretty, and the overall dynamic there is a lot different to London despite them being both big cities. Exploring the city with my besties and capturing each moment in a photo was a lot more heartwarming than I already knew it would be. We’ve changed as people and find that we don’t text as much, but we haven’t grown apart in the slightest. They’ve also gotten me to stray away from my aversion to alcohol… i’m not sure if that was a good change for me

We went on a family + friends cruise on the mediterranean! There were well over 60 of us and that fortnight away is a fortnight I will never ever forget in my lifetime. I think I’ll make a separate post about this because a lot happened, both good and bad and bittersweet.

And now to dampen the positivity of this post, well hold on— I would like to first of all state that writing this post actually made me remember all the good that has happened to me in the past few months. Because the ending made me almost forget most of that.

Actually I’ve decided to leave that for another post too.

things have gone so well this week (apart from a failed test but i'm pretending that never happened)

i finally had a long convo with my mum, and i ended up confessing that my finances weren't great, and that i hadn't done a good job taking care of myself. it was nice to let go off all the burdens weighing on me. she went full mum mode and ordered me a ton of groceries so i wouldn't have to with my own money, and she sent me some money despite me asking her not to worry about it T__T

i took a day off yesterday just to watch anime, play genshin and rest. it was really healing cos i had the energy to get up and go on a lunch date with my new friend (and her bf) and then we all studied together. i got so much work done in record time i'm happy!!

and i think what makes me the happiest! is that i finally got a job!!! hurrah!! and i applied for yet another one today so i'm hoping i hear good news from them hehe

but i can finally make some money and make everyone a lot more comfortable. i'm saving for the future!! for a house, for the cafe i want to open in canada, for everything hehehe

this essay has absolutely been killing me and my mood and my mental health has taken a hit. this morning i gave up and watched a playthrough of omori which just made me cry. but then i got up and actually ate and headed off to the library again and i'm making progress?? at a snails pace but progress is progress!!

i haven't really been into kpop lately tbh, just tuning into the releases of groups i pay attention to. so i'm here at the lib pc trying to write my essay on a topic i know absolutely nothing about, and i decide to put on a kpop playlist on spotify. not one of mine but one of those spotify curated ones that throw only the relevant poppy songs in. and yeah i deffo deffo love run2u.

but that's not it. BOP BOP??!! by viviz, and i think i need to apologise to twice's formula of love album. i listened to it once and wrote it off as boring and full of skips with a disappoint tt. but scientist isn't that bad. it's nice but still boring. BUT MOONLIGHT?? i looped it a bit after and then went to check out the album again and I HAVENT SKIPPED A TRACK (except scientists which is at the beginning). moonlight is so good, so are icon and cruel and now i'm on real you.

but yeah mainstream kpop is not always that bad. ty for indulging in my procrastination post.

does anyone know a good book on greek mythology?

does anyone know a good book on mythology in general? like japanese, ancient egyptian, norse, the sumerians and akkadians and phoenicians etc?

does anyone know any good encyclopaedias?


it's so annoying because i was gifted a really good one as a kid but it's been lost to time now and i don't remember what it was called. it's probably too young for me now anyway.

i never expected jimin to be first place. i expected 5th-7th and i pretty much gave up after riwon was announced. i think this is the first time that my picks have debuted in a survival show and i'm not counting iland (i already knew the lineup before i watched it, although i did bias sunghoon through the show) or pd48 (again i knew the lineup but ended up biasing yujin through it).

for this reason alone, i will be stanning the group. because jimin and chaewon made it. i am a happy bean. or a happy bubbledan (jimin stan). i still can't believe yooyeon didn't make it though.

the lineup is stacked, all the girls in classy are talented. now i just have to pray pocketdol manage them well and give them a great debut!

imagine if they were in a special unit together. would be impossible but a girl can daydream @.@

ningning, yujin, yeji, kyujin, isa, sheon, hikaru, yoon chaewon

it's actually perfect.
we have vocals, dancers, rap (though it's not a necessity at all. dunno why companies feel it's essential.), all-rounders, stage presence, and they are stunning and have an it factor. OR MAYBE IM JUST BIASED

anyway i desperately need ningning and isa to meet PLZ
my 02' kitty babies

would make a nice title actually

remember how i said i had some parts of the song stuck in my head? it was like an itch so i listened to it some more, and i rewatched their weekly idol (with eng subs this time) and at some point it didn't sound... awful? and then wait i actually... like it???

obvs i still totally understand why people don't like the track. it is musically confusing. i get it. but i like it.

there's also the fact that a lot of the disgust for the song stems not only from it's sound but the "mixx pop" controversy and the plagiarism scandals which i won't refute. but my focus is on the song itself. and it's catchy (well to me at least) and i like the choreo. and i like the girls.

i told myself i wouldn't bias anyone younger than niki but i guess i lied. kyujin is my love.

and atp i wanna create my own group with my 4th gen babies: ningning, yujin, yeji, isa, kyujin, sheon, hikaru (AND YOON CHAEWON WHEN SHE DEBUTS) wait i should make this a separate post

bitterness is dedicating so much time and effort to a course since december, only to be denied receiving a certificate because you've missed one session. a session you missed because you were home sick with covid.

yeah.